I've been playing this game called Rockstar a lot recently.


It's an old computer game, text based, that I used to play when I was like
13 or 14. I found it again recently, and have been playing it nonstop.


I've also been listening to Brandtson's "Fallen Star Collective" a lot
recently -- not because I want to, but because I eventually need to write a
review of it.


The first time I put it on, a friend of mine asked me if it was Radiohead.
Unfortunately, it wasn't. 


Brandtson play bland "emo" and sing about God and Jesus. I think I'm
confused. The kids like this, I don't. 


Brandtson don't really do anything new or interesting at all, in fact, if
they changed their name to Blandtson, it would probably be more appropriate.


To tie this all together, I played a game of Rockstar as Brandtson. I
avoided all drugs and alcohol, toured constantly, and released records.


Here's how I did.


The game told me that Brandtson was a "very annoying stage name," first
thing. I quickly recorded the album "Fallen Star Collective," and my
manager told me it was a "crass name".


During all this time, I toured constantly, but we'll talk more about the
tours later.


I released two singles from the album -- "As You Wish" (ridiculous name)
and "Breaking Ground" (funny name). 


After two years and 39 weeks of being almost constantly on the road,
writing songs, doing promtional tours, I became so depressed that I slit my
wrists and died.


I didn't do so badly, though. "Breaking Ground" broke the top 50 in the
local area, Europe and the UK and "Fallen Star Collective" broke the top
100 in those places, too.


I had five tours in my nearly three years as a rock musician. I started out
small, touring small clubs in the local area and was met with a lively
reception. I expanded my touring base to the UK and played the same venues
to a mixed reaction. I then decided it was time to hit Europe -- same
venues -- and I was met with adulation. Finally, I decided it was time to
take a 9 week tour of the clubs in America. Although it was a bit of a let
down coming from the adulation of the Europeans, it was still a positive
reaction. My final tour was of large halls in the local area where my fans
went wild.


Not long after that tour, I killed myself.


The Europop poll showed me at number 30, and NTV's American poll showed me
at number 90. I was just on the verge of breaking big. 


My accountant told me I had "several hundred thousand" in the bank when I
died.


I guess it just goes to show you that there are morons out there that will
listen to anything.